Fallen
by korenara
Summary: /GraLu/ He likes her, a lot actually. If only things were less complicated than it currently is, maybe they would be great together.


**Bottled Up**

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><p>I never really knew <em>how<em> or _when_ it started.

I sure do know how I gotten in too deep. Yep, I'm in love. And it's not with that crazy fan girl stalker, nor is it the scarlet haired dictator. It's not the white haired beauty that always works behind the bar counter, and it's not her little sister either. It's not that short bookworm bluenette. It's definitely not that brown haired psycho with the glasses. Also, not that green haired cow girl. The resident drunk is really hot, but _nah_, not my type.

Of _all _the girls here in the guild, it just had to be _her._

No girl has ever piqued my interest as much as she does. Heck, before I met her I didn't know I could _feel _such a kind of strong attraction. The feeling I have for her is completely foreign. She's the first girl I'm actually in love with, and truthfully, I'm a bit terrified.

Now I know what you're thinking, and I'm gonna stop you right there. No, I'm no damn_ virgin_. I've had my fair share of sexual encounters thank you very much. And have been deemed as 'great in bed'. But even though I've had sex with a few women, that's just it, I just had _sex_ with them. Never once have I had deep connection with the women I slept with. I meet them, get cozy, do what I have to, and then part ways the moment it ended. That's just how I preferred it.

But since I met _her_, she made me thought different.

Those chocolate brown eyes of hers… Her beautiful blond silky hair…That creamy skin that can put porcelain to shame… Oh, and not to mention that slammin' body! I can't even tell you how many times I wanted to just lock her up in my house and take advantage of her _all_ day _long_.

But seriously, her over all looks are just bonus. What really made me fall hard for her was because of her warmness…Her incredible common sense...Her kind heart…The way she uses her sex appeal to get what she wants (and failing miserably)…Her funny expressions…Her infectious enthusiasm…The fact that she is willing to sacrifice her life without hesitation for a friend…Her determination to become stronger…I can go on and on. Cheesy, I know... but I love everything about her, all her perfection down to her little flaws. _Everything_.

You see, what makes this whole thing a bit complicated is that, well, she's already into someone else. And it doesn't take a genius to figure out that He's into her too. Who wouldn't be? They're close, really close. The way he smiles at her makes my stomach turn. The way she smiles back to him makes me wanna cry for weeks on end. I get jealous by just looking at them, and the annoying part is that I don't even have the _right_ to be jealous.

And the _even more_ annoying part is that, of all the dang men here, she fell for the most obnoxious bastard of all. At first I thought that there was just no way that she'd ever fall for that guy, but she did, and I'm still having trouble believing it to this day. The first question that popped in my head was _why him_? And the next was _why not me_? It's not like they're dating or anything but _still_.

Can you just imagine how I'd take it if they _were_ dating? I'm having trouble with my jealousy even now that they're still 'friends'.

If she were mine, I'd say that I love her every single fucking day. I'd show her how I love her by slathering her with kisses every time I get the chance. I'd send her body to Cloud Nine every night before she goes to sleep. Oh, the thought of taking her sweet virginity away. _Me_, her first love conquest… I'd make sure she'd never ever forget her first time with me. _It'll be a 20/20 experience, I'd try out those cool moves I learned from Loke an—_

Just then, my naughty thoughts were cut off by an angelic voice. There she was, my 'dream girl', leaning on the table in front of me, displaying her beautiful smile. I didn't even notice her walking up to me. "Good morning, Gray."

"Morning, Lucy." _Damn_,_ I think my voice just squeaked_!

"Have you seen Natsu around? My rent is due very soon and I was thinking of going on a quick mission with him." and there she goes, it's always fucking _Natsu this_, and _Natsu that_! What does she see in that freaking moron? Why doesn't she ever ask _me_ to go out on a mission with her?

"Nope, haven't seen him since yesterday." I said nonchalantly.

She huffed and pouted her rosy lips. "Really? Where could he be off to, I wonder."

_I _really _couldn't care less where that guy is._

"I also haven't seen Erza around for quite a while." Taking a seat next to me, she laid her head back and crossed her arms. "Don't you have _any_ idea where they are or when they'll show up?"

What's the big deal? _I'm _freaking _here_, "No idea Luce, sorry."

"Awe, I'm forty thousand jewels short on rent money. No small job for one is gonna pay _that_ much." Lucy whined as she closed her eyes in what I can see as frustration. I looked at her expectantly, _Okay, you're freaking sitting right next to a _great_ ice mage for crying out loud_! She seemed to be deep in thought, still closing her eyes. God knows what she could be thinking right now.

_Just ask me_! I screamed in my head, biting my tongue.

As we sat there in silence for a few good seconds, my eyes drifted to her face, slowly observing her features, her mouth was slightly parted, cheeks tinted with pink, and her breathing; slow and steady. I gulped. Its brief moments like this that I can get to appreciate her subtly; sitting with her is as good as it gets for me. But I don't mind that much; it's a privilege enough to be just in the same _room_ as her.

She always looks so_—so_—_damn_. I tried to distract myself by looking around the hall, but failing miserably as my eyes keep darting back to her. She wasn't really doing anything, _sure_, but the sight itself was erotic in its own innocent way. I licked my upper lip, images of Lucy's naked body started to flash incessantly in my head. _Geez, this girl's made me such a pervert_. I literally just want to pin her on the ground right here and now and kiss her stupid, but she'll probably slap me into next week if I did that though.

"Hey, uhm…"

"_Yeah_?"

She pursed her lips and squinted her eyes, "You don't happen to have any plans today do you?"

"No!" I blurted out tensely, _fuck,_ I cleared my throat awkwardly and said in a more calm tone, "I mean, _no_. I _don't _have any plans."

_This is it. She's definitely asking me._ "Oh, okay."

_What? 'Oh, okay!?' _For a second there I was absolutely sure she was gonna ask me for help! Does she think that I'm not good enough?

"I guess I'll ask Levy if she'd like to go with me, I think she's—"

"You insult me, Lucy Heartfilia." I sighed. "I'll go with you."

She just blinked, "Eh? Well, you don't have to! It's fine really!"

"As I said, I don't have anything going on today." I sounded a bit insistent, but to hell with it really, I want to go with her so-so-_so_ badly.

"And as _I_ said, it's okay. Levy can come with me, or I can tag along with team Shadow Gear, or—."

"Wait, I feel like you don't want me to help you. What don't you like me, Lucy?"

"I-it's not like that!" Her face turned red at my question. "I just _can't_."

"Why?"

She looked over her shoulders, from left to right, then behind and then ahead, looking a bit uneasy, "It's just, well…"

I too looked around our surroundings, trying to spot any nosy busybodies, "Don't worry, no one's listening in." I assure her.

Lucy then moved closer until our shoulders brushed each other, leaning in to my ear as she whispered, "You do know that Juvia's gonna skin me alive if she knew that were going on a mission all alone, right? She'd be boiling with anger. She'd _kill_ me."

_Juvia_? "Why would she be mad?"

Her face scrunched up, "Ugh, _because_ she's wrapped up in this ridiculous notion that I have feelings for you," she said, pulling her hair with her hands, "in her state of mind this crazy love triangle between the three of us actually exists, I mean, don't you think that's totally silly?"

I faked a little chuckle, "That _is_ silly."

"We see each other as nothing more than friends, and that will never change. Why can't she see that though?"

Her words slowly sunk in, and I've never felt shittier than ever. "…Y-yeah."

Realizing that her side's still pressed against mine, she awkwardly moved away (much to my dismay). "And plus," she fidgeted with her fingers, face slightly flushed, "there's only one guy I have my eyes on."

Yeah, _of course_. A sigh escaped my mouth, "I know." The look in her eyes is the same as mine when I'm reminded of her… It's the look of longing. _She really does like him, huh? _

"You do?" she asked in disbelief, "quit lying, Gray. I _know_ you don't know."

"Uh, _yeah_, I _do_."

"_No_, you _don't_"

"I'm seriously _not_ lying right now."

"Just quit it already."

"Bu—"

"_NO_."

"It's not hard to figure out, Lucy. You like Na—" before I could finish, her hands were already fastened on my mouth.

"Okay, okay. You know that I have a crush on him, you don't have to say it out loud!"

I looked at her, absolutely motionless. I feel like my heart's been ripped out and been slashed repeatedly by a knife, stepped on a hundred times and then got run over by a truck.

She let go and returned my stare, "Is it obvious? Does everyone know?"

Jesus, it's as clear as day! Both of them are always with each other! _All_ the time!

"I don't know." I say flatly.

"Well, can it be just our little secret, Gray? I'd die of embarrassment if everybody knew."

_Another_ sigh escaped my mouth, "Sure," I forced a small smile, "I won't tell."

She threw her hands in the air in relief, "Yay!"

"_If_,"

"I-if?"

"I won't tell a soul, _if_ you let me go with you on a job for your rent."

"But… J-Juvia!" her face plastered a completely horrified look.

"Natsu and Erza are _away_, we're _teammates_. Stop complicating things. Juvia has no right to dictate who you can and cannot go with on a mission. Let me help you."

"… You're right"

"You're damn right I'm right."

She beamed. "I guess I'm saved then! Thanks a lot. I'm gonna go pick a job now." Lucy scooted closer and gave me a quick hug (too quick for my taste) and rose up from the seat. "Just don't tell Juvia alright?"

"Yeah… don't tell Juvia."

Shove yourself deeper in the friend zone, Gray. Fucking wonderful.

As she was walking away, I shamelessly stared at her butt, her cute, squeezable, untouched by a guy, butt. "How can I ever control myself on this mission?"

My friendship status with Lucy is just too precious to lose. One wrong move and it'll be over before I know it. But _damn_, just being with her already sends me spiraling to this sick sexual tension, let alone put in a situation where we're stuck with each other for hours. What if I accidentally jump in her bed at night? Then what?

A fit hormonal stud like me, all alone in a hotel room with _THE_ Lucy Heartfilia? That sounds like a recipe for disaster! A smutty, erotic disaster, that is.

_Oh, well._

I brought this upon myself. No use on turning back now. As long as I don't stare at her too much. And as long as I can keep my hands to myself, then I guess I'll be just fine. I'll be on my best behavior._ I mean_, I've hidden my feelings for her for quite some time now… I'm sure I can keep it up.

Casually observing people going about their business around the guild, a tuft of blonde hair caught my eye. Lucy was in front of the request bored, looking for a job as said. She was excitedly going through flyers. And a smile couldn't help but creep in on my lips.

_I'm in love with a girl who likes _Natsu_…_

"Shit. What have I gotten myself into?"

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><p><em>So I deleted this story a few months ago bc there was literally a nonexistent plot and well, I was personally convinced that the writing was all over the place. Now that I've come up with a solid story line, I thought it was about time to post it again.<em>

_Whatcha think of the first chapter? Yay or Nay?_

_PS_

_I was once **korenmae**, now it's **korenara** xoxo_


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